Sofa and Then Some

I recently purchased a sleeper sofa on what was a very quiet night at the furniture store. Three salesmen (all approximately age 22) were sitting on (what else?) a sofa doing pretty much nothing. They soon began complimenting my coat. Really, boys... my coat? Is that the best you can do? Did you happen to overlook my rack and hot ass? Maybe I should stop covering up with a coat...

The coat discussion continued long enough to become awkward. Someone asked, "I didn't know North Face had a Summit Series. What's different about that?" I had faked interest as long as I could. I said, "I really don't know. I got this in China. It's not a real North Face." I realize the point of having counterfeit goods is to pass them off as real, but I DON'T CARE.

My admission only prolonged the conversation. We discussed my impressions of China and the quality of a fake North Face coat. It might not do the trick in Rochester, but it is good enough for South Carolina... as long as it's not raining. I learned the hard way that both ends of the hood have the same type of velcro. In other words, it doesn't stick together. You get what you pay for.

One of the guys shared a life-long dream: "You know what? I've always wanted to go to China. I would check into a fancy hotel, get all dressed up, then go down to the front desk and ask... 'Excuse me, do you know where I can get some good Chinese food?'"

He cracked himself up, and his buddies chuckled too. I, on the other hand, still struggle to find a shred of humor in this suggestion. Is it supposed to be funny because he's asking for Chinese food in China? But then why the build up about the hotel and fancy clothes? The guy appeared to be of Chinese descent... does that somehow make it funny?

When finally placing my sofa order, a particularly over-enthusiastic member of the sales team told me he would remember my March 3rd furniture delivery date because "THAT'S MY BIRTHDAY!" And he'll have no trouble remembering my name because "THAT'S MY MOM'S NAME!" Goofy as he was, I'll give credit where credit is due. Calling me by the right name earns you a few points these days.